b o t t o m l a n d

leaves

Something miraculous has occurred in our life.  The leaves have arrived!  The last few weeks of warmer weather have brought swelling buds to the recently-naked limbs...

...but just yesterday it seems, the buds have given way to fully-formed leaves!

The last few days our world has been transformed to a deep, lush green, and it is delightful!  Yesterday Little C and I were having our breakfast out on the porch, and we heard the wind rusting the leaves for the first time!  It was magical!

more mother's day musings

The true story of Mother's Day precedes Hallmark cards and flower delivery services.  It originated as a day of mothers gathering to demand peace in the face of the carnage of the Civil War, and Julia Ward Howe's original proclamation and rallying cry reads as all too pertinent to our current global situation.  Of course, a day to celebrate our mothers and our mothering selves is great, but our culture is all too quick to trade action for consumption.  As mothers it is our sons and daughters (and husbands and selves) who are turned into killers by the machine of war.  As mothers it is another woman's child being killed by our own.  As mothers we hold the power of human life in our bodies, and we hold the moral authority to declare that all of life is sacred.  If we hold our tongues, who will speak for peace?  If we are so easily silenced by the command from on high to consume as usual, who will show the moral fiber to name this madness for what it is? 

A great short essay describing the evolution of Mother's Day is here, written by a UC Davis prof, and below is a poster from my very favorite artist Nikki McClure, which can be purchased here.   Also, many awesome women's peace organizations exist today, such as Code Pink and Mothers Acting Up.  Check it out, and let's think together about what kind of values we want to instill in our children, and what kind of world we are creating for them.

Mother's Day Proclamation - 1870
by Julia Ward Howe

Arise then...women of this day!
Arise, all women who have hearts!
Whether your baptism be of water or of tears!
Say firmly:
"We will not have questions answered by irrelevant agencies,
Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage,
For caresses and applause.
Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn
All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.
We, the women of one country,
Will be too tender of those of another country
To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs."

From the voice of a devastated Earth a voice goes up with
Our own. It says: "Disarm! Disarm!
The sword of murder is not the balance of justice."
Blood does not wipe our dishonor,
Nor violence indicate possession.
As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil
At the summons of war,
Let women now leave all that may be left of home
For a great and earnest day of counsel.
Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.
Let them solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means
Whereby the great human family can live in peace...
Each bearing after his own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar,
But of God -
In the name of womanhood and humanity, I earnestly ask
That a general congress of women without limit of nationality,
May be appointed and held at someplace deemed most convenient
And the earliest period consistent with its objects,
To promote the alliance of the different nationalities,
The amicable settlement of international questions,
The great and general interests of peace.

Happy Mother's Day!

Today I remember not only my personal transformation as a mother, but especially my own mother, Cindy, and my grandmothers, Sylvia and Emma, who are/were wonderful examples of fun, compassionate, spunky mothers in their own right.  I celebrate you all!  Thank you for your guidance and inspiration!

And thank you as well to all my mama friends who have provided me so much support and inspiration.  I have survived many dark moments on the strength of the mothering bond that stretches all around me, touching all the mothers I know and love, and behind me through all of time. Special thanks to my dear women friends who surrounded me with your love and blessing when Little C was born so painfully early.  My Mother Blessing is one of my fondest memories, and I've been thinking lately of the hymn we sang together that August day nearly three years ago.  It reminds me that God is our Great Mother (as well as our Father) and that the nurturing we pass on to our children does not find it's source only in us, but in our Creator as well:

Mothering God, You gave me birth
in the bright morning of this world.
Creator, source of every breath,
You are my rain, my wind, my sun.

Mothering Christ, You took my form,
offering me Your food of light,
grain of life, and grape of love,
Your very body for my peace.

Mothering Spirit, nurturing one,
in arms of patience hold me close,
so that in faith I root and grow
until I flower, until I know.

Special thanks to my mother-in-law, Melinda, for introducing me to this hymn and for being a great mom to my husband and a friend to me!

Happy Mother's Day to all of you!

mothering montage

What an amazing adventure this motherhood thing is!  It has been such a journey of discovery--humbling, terrifying, exhilarating, joyful and above all wondrous!   

Thank you, Little C, for teaching me how to be your mother, and for being patient with me when I don't always do what is best.  Being your mother is one of the greatest honors of my life.  You are a delight!

 

addendum...

I wanted to clarify that my ire regarding maternity care in this country is not directed at individuals struggling to make sense of their choices, but at the system that does not provide women with an opportunity for informed consent.  I hope my post would never make any individual woman feel bad about her birth experience, but that we would be able to respond as a community to this health-care crisis.  However, I do strongly reject the posture of "I'm okay, you're okay, we're all okay."  No!  Not all birth "choices" are equal.  There IS something wrong with birth in America and we need to re-evaluate our cultural practices and ask if they truly serve women and children.  I heard a woman on NPR say this morning, "there is a world of difference between responsibility and blame."  Yes!  We have both personal responsibility and communal responsibility.  We need to support one another as we struggle to make healthy birth and parenting choices, and comfort one another when our birth stories bring grief.  Love leaves no room for blame.

Note on the picture:  One of my old favorites of when Little C was about 6 months old.

the business of being born

I just watched the powerful movie, The Business of Being Born.  If you have not had the opportunity to see it yet, I highly recommend it to any adult who cares about the process of birth in this country.  (You can get it from Netflix, or you can ask your local library to order it! Nudge, nudge!)  Regular readers of this blog and those who know me personally will know that normal birth is a passion of mine!  This is such an important topic and a timely movie, as the c-section rates in America have risen 400% in some places over the last fifteen years, spiraling out of control to levels of 45% or more of births in some urban hospitals.  I cannot state this strongly enough: this is a crisis of health-care in our supposedly "developed" country.  C-sections are major abdominal surgery and pose much greater risks for the health of the mother and baby.  Yes, they are medically necessary sometimes, (in my calmer moments, I like to think that mine saved Clara's life) but there is no accounting for the rate they've reached in this country.  Actually, our maternal and infant mortality rates are among the worst in the industrialized world. In a UN study of 171 countries, the US ranked 41st on maternal mortality rates, far behind our global peers in Europe and Japan, and below developing countries such as South Korea (1).  According to an article published on CNN.com, highlighting a study by Save the Children researchers, the US has an infant death rate second only to Latvia in the industrialized world.  Incidentally, one of the key differences between America's birthing industry and the birthing practices of the rest of the world is midwife attendance.  Midwives attend upwards of 70% of births in Japan and many European countries in stark contrast to less than 8% in America. When midwives attend births, the levels of c-sections and other medical interventions decrease accordingly.

Bewilderingly, TIME magazine just published a chilling article on the popularity of elective c-sections among "choosy moms."  (I'm linking to this article, even though it is full of misinformation and flat out contradictions to well-documented medical facts.  PLEASE educate yourself about the reality of the situation before reading an article like this and believing it!)  This is a sickness in our country, that we would choose the "convenience" of an elective cesarean and subsequent tummy tuck over the potential health risks to our children and ourselves.  Vaginal birth provides a variety of documented health and safety benefits to our babies, ones that should only be overlooked for the option of cesarean only in the most extreme of circumstances.  A woman is five to seven times more likely to die from a cesarean delivery than from a vaginal delivery.  This should not be taken lightly to accommodate the schedules of mothers or doctors.

But the issue of c-sections aside, even "standard" medical interventions such as the use of pitocin and epidurals come with a host of risks (read this excellent article to find out more details). The unfortunate reality is that we have created a system in this country where one medical intervention leads to another.  Often, just showing up at a hospital to birth your baby is cause enough to start the chain of interventions.  If labor isn't "progressing" according to the desires of the doctors or hospital protocol (this does vary among practitioners and hospitals, so it's a good question to ask when choosing a birthing location) then pitocin is administered to speed up contractions.  Unfortunately, pitocin generally causes very intense and painful contractions, that frequently don't let up the way natural contractions do.  Withstanding the pain of pitocin-induced contractions without pain meds is a feat indeed (yeah, Brook!) but most women understandably then ask for an epidural, which numbs the pain, but incidentally slows down labor, often leading to the need to up the pitocin levels, or, if labor is really stalled, an "emergency" c-section.  What a sad cycle!

The saddest part of it all is that birth is an inherently empowering, life-changing experience for women, and this is being handed over to the "experts."  When did a woman's body cease to be the expert on birthing her own baby?  What is the price we are willing to pay for this "expertise"?  Where is the feminist outrage that we are being "manhandled" by the powerful medical lobby?  Of course, it isn't all doom and gloom.  Women all across our country are choosing to birth their own way, be it in the comfort and safety of their own homes, in a free-standing birth center, or bravely birthing mindfully in a hospital setting.  Many smaller hospitals are more birth-friendly, such as the incredible hospital where Clara was supposed to be born and where my nephew(!) will be born this summer.  Many hospitals are developing homey birthing centers where you can be attended by a Certified Nurse Midwife, rather than an OB.  (A woman interviewed in The Business of Being Born points out that Obstetricians are trained as surgeons and specialists in childbirth pathology or illness, and receive little to no education in healthy, normal births.  It is wonderful to have an Obstetrician on hand to handle emergencies, but there is no reason that they should be attending normal births!)  Birth can be an exhilarating experience for the mother, that leaves her feeling powerful and charged with the brain chemicals and hormones that are only released through a vaginal birth.  These chemicals and hormones provide her with a strong sense of love and protection for her child, and give her an adrenaline rush that gives her the strength to keep going after the exhausting birth experience.  Being medicated out of this experience should not be done casually or routinely.  I love the picture below and the look of pure ecstasy and wonder on the mother's face.  When I think about my own traumatic birth experience, pictures like this make me cry!   Oh, what a miracle birth is, medical or not!  But there is a unique magic to normal birth that is not replicated through medical intervention...

So, that was my long explanation of why you should check out the challenging, inspiring, moving and funny new film, The Business of Being Born.  As the tag line says, you'll never look at birth the same way again!  Take a look at the trailer, below:

green goodness

I've been breaking my locavore eating habits and buying bananas en masse to feed my new green smoothie addiction.  Yes, I said green, folks!  That's spinach with bananas, apples, strawberries, flax seed, fresh lemon juice, cantaloupe, whatever else I want to throw in there, but the main ingredient is spinach!  I did a raw cleanse last week, eating a smoothie for breakfast and lunch and a big salad for dinner.  In between I snacked on nuts, dried fruit and fresh fruits and veggies.  I ate whenever I was hungry, but I ate raw, and I felt incredible!  I woke up feeling rested, I had great energy all day...  I could never convert to raw food permanently and exclusively, but many doctors recommend a diet of about 80% raw, and I think that would be good for me.  Last weekend Dave and I took a getaway (just the two of us!) and I ate a bunch of "regular" food, all of high quality and fresh ingredients--not super processed, but still...  I felt so sluggish and bloated afterwards.  It was kind of incredible, actually.  I became so powerfully aware of how much I'm affected by what I put into my body.  I've been getting a lot of inspiration from the happy foody blog by Sara, whose Walk Slowly, Live Wildly blog I used to read a lot.   She had a Green Smoothie challenge a few months back, and her first post has lots of great ideas for varying the basic smoothie.  I tell you, LOOK OUT!  Once you start feeling how healthy your body can be eating fresh, whole foods, you'll never go back to processed "food"!  Happy eating!

tricycle love

Something exciting has happened in the life of my little girl.  She has gotten her first bike!  An early birthday present arrived from Ami and Bepa (my parents) on Saturday morning in the form of her very first tricycle.  Let me tell you, there has been a lot of bike riding since then!  Today is rainy (Finally!  We've been in a near drought here!) so no bike riding today...  To fill the void we've been jamming out to Medeski, Martin and Wood's kids album, Let's Go Everywhere (run, don't walk to get this CD!  It ROCKS!) and watching the equally fabulous music video of Frances England singing her song, Tricycle, which is a new favorite in these parts. 
I love good kids music!  It's not always easy to find, but it is out there...  What are you listening to these days?  Any good tunes for kids or adults? 

food and our carbon footprint

If you have five minutes, I'd encourage you to listen to this fascinating short report from the NPR news show Day to Day.  This whole week they are doing spots on lifestyle choices that impact climate change, and today's spot was about FOOD.  I was blown away by the fact that food contributes a THIRD of the world's greenhouse gases (way more than vehicle use).  We're accustomed to thinking of the health costs of our food, but how often do we think about the environmental costs of what we eat?  Fascinatingly enough, they usually go hand in hand.  Nearly 20% of the world's greenhouse gases come from meat production, beef being by far the deadliest.  Hmmm...  Beef is also the meat that's the worst for our bodies!  Interesting...  Perhaps we're supposed to be eating a LOT less beef than we do.  Just a thought... 

Here is a short article by a woman who reduced the meat intake of her family drastically, without her picky and meat-loving son even noticing!  She includes a weekly meal-plan example, and a host of links to more in-depth information on how our food choices impact the planet.  And as I've referenced often enough on this blog, Sustainable Table is a great organization whose website is a gold-mine of information on this stuff.

Just thought I'd share some more reasons to go local as we swing into the growing season up here!

a picture and a poem

I was introduced to this delightful poem by my friends Esther and Nate, who had this read at their wedding.  It makes me deeply glad.  I'm sharing a picture (don't worry, it's from a few months ago--we no longer have much snow!) of my beloved to accompany this portrait of a couple in the evening of their lives.  I can well imagine my husband talking the ear off the meter reader...

Here by Grace Paley

Here I am in the garden laughing
an old woman with heavy breasts
and a nicely mapped face

how did this happen
well that's who I wanted to be

at last a woman
in the old style sitting
stout thighs apart under
a big skirt grandchild sliding
on off my lap a pleasant
summer perspiration

that's my old man across the yard
he's talking to the meter reader
he's telling him the world's sad story
how electricity is oil or uranium
and so forth I tell my grandson
run over to your grandpa ask him
to sit beside me for a minute I
am suddenly exhausted by my desire
to kiss his sweet explaining lips.

My little pagan pixie...

Little C must be subliminally picking up on all the thinking I've been doing on gender and God-image.  Last night we watched the full moon rise from the window above our bed (through the screen, I might add!!!) and we sang the "Lady Moon" song:

Lady Moon, Lady Moon
Sailing so high...
Drop down to Little C
From out of the sky!

Little C, Little C
I cannot come...
I hear you calling,
I hear you calling
But I cannot come.

After settling down into bed, we closed our eyes and began the blessing prayer that we say with Little C every night:  May the Creator God bless you and keep you; may She make her face to shine above you; may she lift up her countenance above you and give you peace.  Little C stopped be before getting more than the first few words out and said, "No!  Not Creator God!  Lady Moon God!"  So we prayed to Lady Moon God, and then Little C drifted off to sleep peacefully...

(I don't have any appropriate Lady Moon pictures, so I'm including some of my recent favorites!)

laundry poems

I thought I'd continue with the laundry theme today and post some laundry poems.  I found these through the Project Laundry Line site, which has a collection of laundry line-related art.  I found the images through that same source.  The painting is by Ashley Cecile, the Painting Activist, whose site is fascinating.  The photograph is from the Flicker pool of blogger Mrs. Washalot, whose site I also found to be delightful (if not recently updated...)  Enjoy!

Wash by Jane Kenyon

All day the blanket snapped and swelled
on the line, roused by a hot spring wind....
From there it witnessed the first sparrow,
early flies lifting their sticky feet,
and a green haze on the south-sloping hills.
Clouds rose over the mountain....At dusk
I took the blanket in, and we slept,
restless, under its fragrant weight.

Laundry by George Bilgere

My mother stands in this black
        And white arrangement of shadows
        In the sunny backyard of her marriage,
        Struggling to pin the white ghosts
        Of her family on the line.
        I watch from my blanket on the grass
        As my mother’s blouses lift and billow,
        Bursting with the day.
        My father’s white work shirts
        Wave their empty sleeves at me,
        And my own little shirts and pants
        Flap and exult like flags
        In the immaculate light.

It is mid-century, and the future lies
        Just beyond the white borders
        Of this snapshot; soon that wind
        Will get the better of her
        And her marriage. Soon the future
        I live in will break
        Through those borders and make
        A photograph of her—but

      For now the shirts and blouses

        Are joyous with her in the yard
        As she stands with a wooden clothespin
        In her mouth, struggling to keep
        The bed sheets from blowing away.